Reflections at 3:55 AM: The Journey to Liberation and Spirit-Led Living

Reflections at 3:55 AM: The Journey to Liberation and Spirit-Led Living

As I sit here in Sedona, Arizona, at 3:55 AM, I find myself reflecting on the state of the world, the state of my inner world, and the state of my immediate outer world—the people, places, and energies that closely surround me. I’m also reflecting on my past, my present, and my relationships with my dreams, desires, and purpose. I am filled with a wide range of emotions, drawn from the depths of my lows and the heights of my highs. In this moment of reflection, I am confronted with the various realities present before me.

I remind myself often of the pledge and oath I made to myself post incarceration as well as my responsibility to the collective. In my opinion, there is no collective liberation without personal liberation and transformation. We must be as committed to the movement within our own lives as we are to any collective movement we engage in. The personal is political, and the political is personal.

You’ve heard the phrase, "healing starts at home." Well, we were given a temple the moment we were born. At first, it seems like we’re renting this body, then leasing it, and finally "buying" it—because capitalism owns us in so many ways, shaping the decisions we make about how we live. But what would it take to truly claim ownership over our lives? What needs to happen? What resources must we activate to say, "I own my choices, my reactions, and my body"? And can that ever be a reality when decision-makers create laws that strip us of rights and restrict our movements?

How do we coexist in a world filled with such miraculous, vibrant, and colorful joy while also burdened by so much heavy, awful, debilitating sorrow? Every day, we make a choice about where we stand on this spectrum and how much energy we dedicate to each side. Your purpose, passion, and reason for being here at this specific moment are just as important as the fight for justice, joy, and liberation. When you contribute to your own well-being, you raise the collective consciousness of the world, you impact everyone that you encounter. When you fight for social justice and dignity, you don’t give guilt your power—you simply do what you can, when you can. You sacrifice when you have it in you, and you pull back when you need to. We are focused on longevity for that we need endurance and to increase our endurance we need to monitor our pace and energy output.

Some people are irritated with the state of the world and resentful—and they’re doing nothing about it. That’s fine; it’s a choice. Some people feel the same way about the state of their own lives—and, again, that’s a choice. Yes, there are limitations and perceived barriers. Yes, structural barriers exist. But do you have the power to move around or through them? Yes.

I say this as someone who has dealt with trauma, sexual assault, low self-worth, addiction, incarceration, and so much more. I understand challenges, my central nervous system will not let me forget. But I also know the strength of the spirit, the power of a made-up mind, and the potency of imagination. During my season of transformation, the greatest things I had to sacrifice were my pride, ego, comfort, scarcity mindset, and daily perceptions of who I am to myself and others. I had to surrender—to myself, to God’s will, and to the energetic field of the universe—every single day.

Nothing beats strategic planning, surrender, faith, and action. The only thing stronger is unwillingness. Many of us are unwilling to let go—of pain, hurt, false beliefs, or unrealistic expectations. If you want it—whatever it is—you first have to remove the rubbish blocking you from the inner resources you need to access.

Me? I’m an old dope fiend who transitioned out of my job and paid my bills five months ahead so I could rest, reset, and execute. My ultimate goal is to fulfill the promises I made to myself, the God of my understanding, and my community—to bring my gift to life, fully and boldly. That journey took sacrifice and hard work, but most of all, it took trust and faith.

Without those foundational principles, I wouldn’t have had the courage to leave a great-paying, fulfilling job just months after buying a two-family unit, or to travel the world to hear God speak to me. But I did. I am. And I want the same for you: space to hear, to be guided, to be directed—to be led. Your journey doesn't have to look like mine, in fact it won't because yours is tailor made for you..

We all need resources, but the intangible ones are the most essential. These are the resources we must seek, grasp, grip, and then unleash to live fully.

I hope to see you at the launch of Spirit Led Coaching and Consulting on 1/11 where we will explore how to tap into our essence and make faith-based decisions backed by faith-based actions. Let’s build together.